Archive for 2011

Santa’s workshop outsourced to Third World elves
The North Pole was hit with a series of devastating mass lay-offs yesterday when throngs of elves, some of whom
UN called in to resolve washing-up stalemate
The United Nations has been forced to intervene in an inner-city sharehouse this week after a feud over who was
Rapper chooses bikini-clad ho theme for upcoming video
The visionary rhymer also decided his backing singer should perform in front of a wall with spraypainted writing on it
Bin Laden captured after checking-in on Foursquare
Al-Qaeda leader and amateur short filmmaker Osama bin Laden has been captured after 'checking-in' to a local butcher
Mutant Ninja Turtles now experiencing mid-life crisis
The one-time Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles have spent their mid-thirties questioning their life choices of living in a sewer and eating only Pizza
Junkie genuinely needs two dollars for train fare
Another two dollars for the laundromat is also genuinely needed, and is definitely not going to be spent on booze
Schwarzenegger ends term as Governor: lowers himself into molten metal
The governor offered a frank apology for his shortcomings as a cybernetic organism programmed only to kill