Archive for 2017

WOW! Government shocked as postal vote provides 2012 opinion poll results
"We literally had no way of knowing this would be the outcome"
First Same Sex Proposal Officially Celebrated As Woman Proposes to Cow
"The wedding is set to be held on a very very slippery slope"
Number of dickheads in Australia slumps below 5 million
Australians around the world breathed sigh of relieve this morning when it was revealed that the number of dickheads has
Malcom Turnbull celebrates yes vote – reveals plan to marry sound of own voice
"It's high time I made my love for my own voice official."
Frydenberg says people shouldn’t be penalised for fleeing persecution, as long as they’re in his family
Josh Frydenburg has mounted a robust defence of families fleeing persecution coming to Australia as long as they’re in his
ISIS claims responsibility for all bad driving done by dickheads
"Every time someone side swipes your mirrors, that's ISIS"
Gay friend promises not to tell anyone you left it this late to post your same sex marriage form
Recent polls have shown that 40% of people under 30 haven't yet returned their survey forms, and that 100% of those are just lazy dipshits like you
Turnbull wishing he was a citizen of another country right now
The Prime Minister was seen filling out an application for New Zealand citizenship just minutes ago
Crown competitor spruiks untampered pokies that boast amazing .00001% chance of win
"Those are some great odds."
Outrage as rigged machines revealed to be slightly more rigged
"From now on I'll only be spending my money on psychic hotlines."