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#ChaserUSA Blog 02: “Mark Donald as Spam”
Free water.

You know that face you make when you brush your teeth and put on clean underwear for the first time in a couple of days?

No? It looks something like this:

American Airlines found my suitcase and so it is now no longer in Atlanta preparing for the next season of The Walking Dead and finally we can get started on this tour thing.

The first suburb we are staying in in North Carolina is like something out of the Truman Show. That is code for White by the way. Charles was so inspired and creeped out by the whole thing that he came up with this idea for a USA travel tip which he wrote and we filmed in the space of a morning:

One disadvantage to registering as media (or even as punters) to a campaign rally is that they then start sending you marketing emails all the goddamn time. Well the joke’s on them because we can’t vote. We are just here being leeches on the democratic process. I know that’s why I got involved with The Chaser.

Anyway I’ve noticed the Hillary campaign emails are a lot more personal. I suppose the theory is this will make her seem charming and warm. (It doesn’t work.) The subject line is always something like “Hi! Drew here from Hillary NC…” or “It’s Rosa again! Can you spare a minute?” or “Will we see you at the rally today?”. Either Hillary has a lot of volunteers or her email bot has some serious clingy-ex firmware that she needs to update.

Trump campaign emails on the other hand are much more direct. “Pence in Wilmington today.” or “Don’t forget to early vote.” or “A strong plan for our economy”. Trump emails sound like the taglines to bad blockbuster movies. But the kind you know you’ll see anyway. Because what else are you going to do on a Thursday night in August except watch Channing Tatum and/or Gerard Butler protect the White House from terrorists?

And a protip out there for anybody who receives an email from the Trump campaign: make sure you label it correctly:

 

Anyway, I will leave this entry with a classic American salad which I ordered because I wanted a break from all the greasy chips and burgers:

Salad.

Salad.

They assured me there was a salad under there.