The Chaser

The Chaser's Posts

Anti-social woman breaches ATM etiquette
"I don't know how she was raised," said disgruntled queuer Nick Mendes. "But I was always taught not to waste everyone's lunch hour with on-screen account balances."
Belief system debunked by T-shirt
Churches around the nation have reported a sharp decline in attendance following the revelation of a dogma-shattering item of clothing
Gary Gygax fails saving throw vs heart attack
Although official reports have blamed a heart attack, archmage Mordenkainen is claiming responsibility and demanding experience points for the kill
Outsider artist angry at positive review from conservative critic
"I suppose I'll just have to be even more anarchic and confronting from now on."
‘Gigli’ no better on Blu-ray
The high resolution only makes it's faults even more crystal clear
Lazy man hoping unironed clothes become fashionable
The 30-year-old has experimented with unironed T-shirts and jeans on the weekend, even going so far as to tell a female acquaintance that prominent wrinkles were "all the rage in Milan"
Guy at school reunion remembers way too much
"Lee was pretty quiet at school," said reunion organiser Anna Aprile. "Which made it kinda creepy that he could describe all the different outfits I wore."
Mentally ill Carpet Court employee taken off pricing duties
"We all assumed he was supposed to be there, since he was in costume," said director Brad Pearen. "No-one realised Craig was in serious need of professional help."
Report card accurately predicts child’s future
Westwood, who found his old report in a plastic crate while looking for a bottle of bourbon he had hidden from his wife, described the commentary as "eerily prescient"
Discovery of shallow grave ends 18-year search for Wally
According to an unnamed source, the corpse was dressed in a faded, bloodstained red-and-white jumper, wearing round-rimmed glasses, and buried with a cane