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Ariel Sharon regains ability to blame everything on Palestinians |
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Wednesday, 18 January 2006 |
Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon is still in a coma more than a week after suffering from a massive stroke. Sharon displayed eye movement early in the week, and while it’s not clear how much cognitive function he will regain, doctors say he has now completely recovered his low-level ability to hold the Palestinians responsible for any problem in Israel, including his stroke.
 Bush found Sharon hard to understand even before he communicated exclusively via eye movements and gurgling News that the Palestinians were responsible for Arafat’s condition has led Acting Prime Minister Ehud Olmert to launch an immediate missile attack on Ramallah. “We have destroyed the two remaining buildings used by the Palestinian Authority, as well as a few marketplaces,” Olmert said. “This will show the Palestinians how serious we are about continuing to impose peace on them despite this setback.” The return of Sharon’s capacity to blame Palestine has led most Israelis to call for his immediate return to official duties, but doctors insist it is too soon. “Let’s not forget that before this stroke, there were already signs of brain damage, such as his decision to found a new party with a dove like Shimon Peres,” his neurologist said. Sharon has also undergone a tracheotomy to enable him to breathe independently. “Given his belief in unilateral approaches, we figured he’d want to struggle alone without the assistance of anything that could help him,” his doctor said. “Besides, even if he makes a complete recovery, he’s not going to want to speak in a hurry, at least to the Palestinians.” However despite his condition, Sharon will still be able to play his most important role in Israeli politics – provoking Palestinian intifada. His visit to the Temple Mount with a thousand bodyguards in 2000 sparked the second major Palestinian uprising. “Even a brief, wheelchair-bound visit to the Palestinian-controlled areas of Jerusalem could spark another huge outbreak of despicable mob violence, justifying further brutal Israeli crackdowns.” Olmert said. “So we're going to do it as soon as he's well enough. It's what Ariel would have wanted.” Sharon’s forthcoming summit at the White House will also go ahead despite his severe brain injury. Aides believe his comatose state will only make it easier for him to successfully communicate with President Bush. (0) Add a comment |
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