Rushdie - bringing down the establishment from within

Rushdie said he was pleased to have his efforts recognized rather than his face, and will use the opportunity the award presents to try and stay alive for a little while longer.

Not surprisingly, the knighthood has provoked a storm of fury from in the Islamic world. Pakistan called the Queen's representative to Karachi, to explain himself and model for an effigy, while an angry Tehran said they were willing to try and defuse the situation.

"We could reach a compromise position," said the Iranian ambassador. "where we keep the part of the ceremony where Rushdie kneels and a sword is produced, and just change the ending."

Pakistani clerics responded in kind by giving terrorist mastermind Osama Bin Laden their highest possible honour - he will now throw the opening pitch at the Islamist World Series baseball game.

Outgoing Prime Minister Tony Blair was said to be surprised at the furore, claiming that many of the people objecting to the award "hadn't even read The Satanic Verses ". "And I'm not surprised," he added. "It's completely unintelligible."

He also denied that the action was inflammatory to Muslims, but agreed it could be inflammatory to Glasgow airport.