Bogan unaware his ugg boots are fashionable

Bombo Beach panel-beater Wayde Franklin’s rugged appearance has attracted unlikely praise on his irregular visits to the streets of the inner-city – although he’s at a loss to explain why. His remand centre-style haircut has been singled out for special commendation from passing youth, as has the shapeless cap he wears, proudly promoting KB lager. But no item of clothing has attracted the attention of the citizens of the metropolis more than his sheepskin boots.

Chosen for utilitarian, rather than aesthetic reasons, (a non-functioning car heater in his Datsun 1200 Sunny had made the part-time dirt-biker’s morning drive to work increasingly chilly), Franklin’s footwear nevertheless has passing fashionistas enraptured.

“These chicks keep coming up to me and say ‘where’d ya get the boots? They’re so cool!” said Franklin. “You’d think they’d never been to Lowes.”

Franklin was equally dumbfounded that his greying Megadeth “Hangar 18” t-shirt has drawn admiring glances, largely from those mistaking it for an ironic salute to heavy metal culture, instead of the unironic tribute to the music of Megadeth its owner intended it to be.

Style doyen Ulysses Preskipus says bogan fashion is being embraced by poseurs in a quest for the authenticity they otherwise lack. “This kind of thing can happen when celebrities embrace a down-and-dirty brand like Von Dutch,” he said. “Although in this case, it’s unlikely Lightning Bolt will follow suit.”

Vapid Fairfax fashion editor Fernando Frisoni went as far as featuring a colour photo of Franklin in his “S” style lift-out, something Franklin found out about through an anonymously sent clipping. He was outraged. “Mate, I’ve never been to Morocco. Those sunnies came from a servo.”

Preskipus reassures Franklin the trend will be temporary. “His unintentional fashionableness will only last another 6 months,” he said, “until inner-city hipsters demonstrate their abject shallowness through the ironic adoption of a different aesthetic.”

“C’arn the doggies”, he added.