Aussie republicans plan “study tour” to Nepal

[Edition 40] KATHMANDU, Sunday: The head of the Australian Republican Movement Greg Barnes has arrived in Nepal, where he’s scheduled to meet Crown Prince Dipendra to discuss new strategies for removing royal families. Mr Barnes believes the republican movement has a lot to learn from Prince Dipendra, whose recent massacre of his family demonstrated a proven ability to eradicate a monarchy.

[Edition 40] KATHMANDU, Sunday: The head of the Australian Republican Movement Greg Barnes has arrived in Nepal, where he’s scheduled to meet Crown Prince Dipendra to discuss new strategies for removing royal families.

Mr Barnes believes the republican movement has a lot to learn from Prince Dipendra, whose recent massacre of his family demonstrated a proven ability to eradicate a monarchy.

“He did it efficiently, cheaply, and with no changes whatsoever to the constitution,” Mr Barnes noted. “Although he may have got some blood on it.”

The republican advocate said it was now obvious Australia had gone down the wrong path with democratic referendums, which he believes are too political and involve too little killing.

News of the royal massacre has devastated the Nepalese population, who are sorry the prince didn’t instead turn his gun on the thousands of backpackers in the country.

A spokesperson for Dipendra, who has now become King, say that if he recovers he will be tried in a court in accordance with the law. They believe, however, that he is a fairly strong candidate for Royal pardon.

It’s believed to be the first time a prince has blown away his family since Prince Edward told the Windsors he was straight.

Royal analysts have described the shooting as the most destructive act against a royal family since Sophie Rhys Jones had tea with a shiek.

The British Royal family has also expressed concern that Prince Harry and Prince William’s school, the prestigious Eton, is the same as that attended by Prince Dipendra. Prince Charles has reminded the children that although Royals believe you should be allowed to kill dumb animals that this does not include other members of their family.

The Queen has taken the opportunity to approach Prince Charles and confirm that, just in case he had been wondering, she completely approved of any plans he might have to marry Camilla Parker-Bowles, or indeed anyone at all, as long as he refrains from shooting her. But in a test to work out whether her mother is in fact immortal, however, the Queen has told her son that the Queen Mother has publicly said that the marriage would go ahead only over her dead body.