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2005 Hottest Year on Record according to ‘Who Weekly’

who_sm.jpgWho Weekly magazine has confirmed what many climate scientists had already suspected: that 2005 was officially the Hottest Year Ever, and that 2006 promised to be “even hotter.” The 22-page, 450-word special report in the Hot Years issue was compiled by a team of two editorial assistants, before being peer-reviewed by the magazine’s sub-editors. It presents strong photographic evidence of rising global temperatures in a variety of exotic locations, often in conjunction with toned abs and dresses that leave nothing to the imagination.

Who Weekly magazine has confirmed what many climate scientists had already suspected: that 2005 was officially the Hottest Year Ever, and that 2006 promised to be “even hotter.” The glossy special issue warned it may already be too late to stop gorgeous celebrities flaunting themselves in future.

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Experts warn that calamitous events like Jessica Simpson acting may become more frequent

The 22-page, 450-word special report was compiled by a team of two editorial assistants, before being peer-reviewed by the magazine’s sub-editors. It presents strong photographic evidence of rising global temperatures in a variety of exotic locations, often in conjunction with toned abs and dresses that leave nothing to the imagination.

Climate expert Professor James Walpole said the Who special issue was alarming even for a professional. “We had identified Asian tsunami and New Orleans hurricane as possible signs that this could be one of our hottest years, but our research missed other key warning signs, like the dramatic rise in Jessica Simpson’s profile.”

But the special report was not totally without positives for the climate. “It’s small comfort, but at least we can say that 2005 was also one of the Most Intriguing years we can remember,” said Walpole. Analysts are still divided on what course of action to take on climate change. Some skeptics have suggested that the temperature increase is in fact due to more accurate satellite technology, rather than actual increases in ambient atmospheric temperature. Others, like acid-mouthed fashion designer Alex Perry have attacked Who on the grounds that 2005 was in fact the Nottest Year on record.

With some bodies urging stricter and more wide-spread adherence to the Kyoto protocol; and others contending that the treaty should be scrapped altogether, there is division even among those who recognize the need for action on global warming. Who offers no formal suggestions on whether a bilateral emissions target or a more ad hoc, technology-based agreement should be pursued, although editor Jane Nicholls does outline some broad boundaries policy formulation in her introduction.

““What made 2005 our hottest year yet? We all know it was fun, flagrant, shameless – and definitely sexy. It was all about knowing what you want – and doing anything to get it. But we also saw how important it was to remember our loved ones.”